Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Brown-low moments

If you're anything like me you hang for the moment on the Tuesday morning post Brownlow medal when it arrives. Your inbox lights up like neon lights with the powerpoint presentation that digs like a knife into the hearts of WAGs (Wives and Girlfriends) of AFL players around the country.

It is a document more scathing than an Andrew Bolt article & more insulting than Australian Labour Party preferred party research piece. Tearing through the dresses, make up and shape of these ladies like a tornedo of massive proportions it leaves a similar trail of destruction. Some of these ladies will never recover. It can make them (See Rebecca Twigley Red dress 2004) and it can break them (See Brynne Edelston 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015....).

So without further ado, lemme-at-em!

Nick Del Santo and his Mrs - When you go to anotehr country I know you get tempted to bring home some of the local garb to wear it back home. But like white cotton pants from Greece don't work in Australia - neither do costumes from Carnivale in Rio..

Brendon Goddard and his Mrs - I loved the movie splash. But that was the 80s and mermaids were a little bit more hip. Sorry Mrs G but Daryl Hannah did it better.

Graham Teasdale and his daughter...Poor fashion sense certainly runs in the family! Bringing with her a wiff of Frankston it seems she hasn't taken her shoes out of their shopping bags? I've heard of leaving the tag on by accident but here there are no excuses..

But after all those fashion roasts I feel I have to finish with a fashion toast... The judds can do no wrong. Hi Bec!!!!!!! I love you. Is it my daily obsessive text messages or the fact that you are married to a superhero that keep us apart?

Krupp signing out....

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Serena fails - Oh no you di-ent

This week was a great week for Australians in the world of tennis. Our girl Sammy Stosur took out her first grand slam championship, winning the US Open in brazen fashion, slaughtering her opponent Serena Williams. Serena, bless her, was none to pleased with this loss, as per her unsportsmanlike outbursts on court. And no doubt she will be none to happy with this post either. I thought I would go with a tennis theme this week and take you back through time to give one of the biggest roasts this blog has ever seen. Serena Williams - Oh no you di-ent. What have you been wearing!

Serena has got to be one of the most vile dressers on the tennis circuit. How many fashion faux pas can a person make before realising that perhaps they should stick to what comes naturally. Ahhh, that's tennis Serena. I'm no expert on female fashion but if anyone can give any justifications on how any of the Serenages below could be a fashion boast I need to know!

Hi Serena.. you shouldn't be wearing short denim skirts And what's with wearing shin guards connected to your shoes?

Put your finger over her faces and breasts and ask yourself, why is man dressed in a black dress at the premiere of a movie? Dress to your strengths Serena...

What's up Batman?

That's all from me for this week!

Signing out..


Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Peter Pan finds a home in Melbourne

My my my it seems Peter Pan has been on the search for a new home and it looks like Elizabeth St in Melbourne's CBD is the new neverneverland.

Thanks to Kim Gill for sending in this, my second fashion roast.

Here's someone who thought it would be a good idea to walk down the street in a green smurf hat, a matching green smock (with paint stains to boot) and belt made up of coloured triangles that seem to have been stolen from a school's sports carnival. As a good friend surely you would stop a person like this leaving the house looking like this..

Have a look for yourself and if anyone can sell in that this is not a FASHION ROAST, I'm all pixie ears..